5 ways to know that you’re falling in love

Here's how to actually know where your relationship is going, rather than just hoping you're still feeling butterflies in your stomach.

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  • We've all had those crushes that we hope will turn into something real and deep. We've also all had those times when we don't really know how we feel about the relationship.

  • I had a roommate in college who would come home every night confused and indecisive about her relationship. One night she would come home and say how much she loved this boy, then the next she was talking about breaking up with him.

  • It was a very confusing time in her life and in mine. I didn't know how to support the relationship or what I was supposed to say when she would come home. At the same time, she didn't know how to sort out the feelings she was experiencing.

  • Here are five ways to sort out your feelings and know you are falling in love

  • 1. You're talking about the future

  • This is probably the easiest and the most surprising way to know if you are in love. If you find yourself agreeing to do things together months in advance, there is definitely real love growing.

  • Planning is one of the easiest things we are constantly doing, but if we are unsure about the relationship, we never plan together. You want to know where things are going with the person before you agree to go to a concert months in advance. When there is real love between you, you agree to these plans probably without thinking about it.

  • You are definitely in love if you have a date circled in a couple of months with a special thing to do with your special someone.

  • 2. You want them to be happy

  • Do you ever find yourself scheming ways to make your sweetheart happier? Maybe you are going to pick up donuts on your way home from work for them or you're planning to surprise them at their job. Either way, you can't wait to see them smile and their eyes sparkle.

  • According to Business Insider, "So-called 'compassionate love' can be one of the biggest signs of a healthy relationship, according to research. This means that you're willing to go out of your way to make your partner's life easier and happier."

  • If you can't wait to see their smile every day, then you are definitely in love.

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  • 3. You feel safe

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  • Vulnerability is a huge part of a healthy relationship. You both need to share important things with each other. Vulnerability only works if the relationship is a safe place.

  • According to EliteDaily, people in unhealthy relationships often hold their opinions and thoughts to themselves. But in a safe, loving relationship, you feel like you can share your opinions and they will be valued.

  • You are falling in love in a healthy relationship if you feel you can share your vulnerabilities.

  • 4. You focus on the positive

  • Sometimes we find it easy to complain about what is happening at work or about what other people are doing. We wish people would be better, smarter, funnier or richer. If you are in love, you will find yourself overlooking some of your partners inabilities.

  • According to Live Science, "People who are truly in love tend to focus on the positive qualities of their beloved, while overlooking his or her negative traits."

  • If you find yourself seeing their good qualities instead of their bad habits, you are probably falling for them.

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  • 5. You're willing to try new things

  • "Everyone wants to impress their date in the beginning of their relationships, but if you find yourself consistently trying new things that your partner enjoys, you may have been bitten by the love bug," says Business Insider.

  • We all have had the moments when we do things just because a cute guy asked us to, but if you find yourself constantly willing to do new things, your feelings for the person has moved from crushing to loving. You are so comfortable with the person that you are not afraid of them shaming you if you mess up.

  • You are falling in love if you don't care what you do - you just want to do it with them.

  • Emotions and feelings can be a funny thing. Sometimes you just have to stop and take a minute to determine how you are feeling. If you agreed to at least three things on this list, then you are most likely falling in love.

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Christa is a part time photographer, part time writer and full time lover of life. She loves eating chocolate chip cookies and singing (but not at the same time). She has her degree in political science.

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